Monday, March 21, 2005

The System versus Me!!

I had heard a lot about Tirupathi and finally had a chance to go there this weekend.
Nine of us went which included me, my roomies, Sreej’s family and Sreej’s friend n her Dad. The trip as a whole was great fun. But somehow, I had the same feeling of guilt that I get when I go to Guruvayoor with Daddu.

The problem (if I can use the term here) with famous temples like Guruvayoor and Tirupathi is that the crowds are HUGE. We have people from different parts of the country thronging here to get a glimpse of the deity. And obviously people are from different sects and classes of society. So what happens in such a situation is that the more affluent and the more influential get the dharshan without standing in the queues. Or even breaking the long queue where people have been waiting for hours.

My dad who frequently visits Guruvayoor knows a lot of people there and so as soon as we go, the volunteers just usher us in(breaking the long queue where probably people were waiting for hours) Ofcourse, 100 Rs is exchanged in the process. I call it “bribe”, though my dad has other terms to describe it. I always feel guilty about it and so am not so enthusiastic to go there coz of the same reason.

The trip to Tirupathi was kinda similar. I was surprised to see different queues based on the amount we pay. If you have a letter referred by a well-established person, (which we get by paying money again!!) then, we can get a ticket. The time of dharshan can also be manipulated by the amount we pay. The pattern was everywhere. We went to Mrs.Tirupathi’s temple after that. As we were running late, and the general queue was long, we were wondering if we can just say Hi to God outside and go. But a volunteer again came by and offered to take us though “Special Dharshan” if we pay his some money. And we did. And got the Dharshan in 15 minutes which would have been impossible had we stood in the general queue.

Our last visit was to Sri Kaala Hasti. We reached around 9:15 and the temple closes around 9:30pm. Surprisingly there was no crowd. As we stood before each statue, the priest explained the mythological significance of each deity and asked us to pray properly. There was no shoving of the devotees and understandably too as there was not much of crowd. But there was the peace and tranquility which we seek when we go to a place of worship. And we were able to appreciate the architecture as well. No.. I’m not here to compare temples and tell which is better but I find the whole system of bribery even in temples (anywhere as a matter of fact) very disillusioning.

It happens everywhere so why gripe about it?
Well, I’m a religious person. I believe in GOD and the Supreme power. I believe GOD is in everyone and hence believe there is goodness in every human being. And why do we go to temples? For hope, for peace of mind, for we believe that there will always be victory of good over evil, forgiveness for our mistakes that we commit knowingly and unknowingly. We’d like to believe that GOD is Supreme and all are HIS/Her[:-)] children are equal. But when we see such kind of corruption and discrimination at his divine premises, I wonder whether hope is restored. Whenever I comply to pay more money to “break” the queue or stand in the “Special Dharshan”, I don’t feel good about it. I go there to cleanse my sins, but instead I end up committing more sins and have the audacity to do it right before the Almighty’s eyes.

As we came back, I realized that the mistake was in my part. Completely and solely. I realized I complain about the system continuously but also give in to vile ways. I am the system as well. I can offer innumerous explanations and justifications and sugarcoat my actions, but the fact remains that people take bribes becoz there are people like us who are willing to give it. As numerous such thoughts crossed my mind, our vehicle was suddenly stopped by a policeman. He asked us if we had the license and related papers. While our driver was extracting all the relevant papers, he unashamedly asked, “Alrite, Give me 20 Rs for tea and then you can go”. Different emotions went through me. But the one that stood out was… Here we were paying bribes to meet GOD. This man is an ordinary mortal after all.